Monday, August 13, 2012

People You Shouldn't Marry I {Guest Post}

This guest post is by Richard Rohlin: the Gentleman Adventurer.

And he's talking about who you should not marry.

THIS I find very interesting.

And I know you will, too.

People You Shouldn’t Marry (Part 1)

In Living Like a King, Richard Rohlin will be examining the kings of Israel and Judah during the Divided Kingdom period. He’ll look at the good, the bad, and the ugly, and from them we’ll learn together what kind of men we ought – or ought not – to be.

“And Ahab the son of Omri did evil in the sight of the LORD above all that were before him.” (1Ki 16:30)

As of this last Friday, my daughter, Tirza, is just six weeks old. This past weekend we took her for her first serious roadtrip when we went out of town for a family member’s wedding. As the bride came down the aisle, it was hard not to look down at the little girl I held in my arms and wonder if that would be my daughter some twenty years hence. I think most dads with daughters will agreewith me that no thought is quite so terrifying.

What kind of woman will she be? Who will she marry? Will it be someone who is good for her – a man who will lead her in a loving and Christlike fashion? Will I have the discernment to know the good men from the charletons and fakes? I pray that I will. But while I am uncertain about many things regarding my daughter’s future and my role in it, I am certain of one thing: I do not want her to marry an Ahab, nor do I want her to be a Jezebel.

So Tirza, if you’re reading this, all those years from now, this one’s for you.

You probably already know about Ahab and Jezebel. You know that they were bad people. In fact, when your mother and I chose your name, there was a long list of names from which we could chosen – but Jezebel never even made the list. It’s synonymous today with a wicked and morally loose woman, and there’s a good reason for that. The original Jezebel set a precedent for wickedness that has ruined the name for any future Jezebels who came after her.

Ahab wasn’t any saint, either. In 1 Kings, we read that Ahab did more evil than any of the kings that were before him. It actually goes into more detail than that, because we see that Ahab knew he was evil and he took pleasure in it, his depraved heart constantly looking for more ways to sin.

And it came to pass, as if it had been a light thing for him to walk in the sins of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, that he took to wife Jezebel the daughter of Ethbaal king of the Zidonians, and went and served Baal, and worshipped him. (1Ki 16:31)

Ahab’s marriage to Jezebel is listed as one of the greatest and most aggregious of his sins – and there’s a good reason for that. Marriage changes you in ways that nothing else will. If you marry well, as I believe I have, then it will be a wonderful blessing that will draw you closer to God in ways unexplainable to a single person. But if you, as a woman, marry an Ahab (or for a man, a Jezebel), it will equally define your life for the worse.

One of the things that a spouse will do is amplify everything aspect of your personality. That is, a good spouse will draw out the good things and make them more so, and a bad spouse will do the same with the bad things. In Ahab’s case, he was already a wicked and idolatrous man, but it was through Jezebel that Baal-worship would first be introduced to the Northern Kingdom of Israel. On the other hand, a good spouse should make you more Christ-like; they are one of the tools that God uses in the process of sanctification.

To be continued…

Sunday, August 12, 2012

What He Says

His smile got to me before his steps. But this morning his mother handed me a few slips of paper. "He was praying the other day, and God told him to tell you this." She read it aloud to me, her finger tracing under the capitalized letters with no punctuation. Tears came and were only chased away by smiles. I think God is rather sweet to tell me all this through His servant. As I read it again, I realized it is for everyone from God, but I added ellipses where it got personal.
__________________________

"I am tending to your heart's garden.
"Daughter, you have passed many tests.
"Every time you pass, I move you to another phase of freedom.
"Remember that I am with you.
"You will never feel alone when you remember this.
"Give to Me your whole heart and I will add unto you its desires, as you seek Me with continued diligence.
"I have given to you many dreams and see every secret longing.
"Wear My Spirit as a comfort, and allow My fullness to become your passion to advance My kingdom to liberate captives...
"You were made to draw men to Myself.
"I am the Lord God Almighty, Maker of Heaven and Earth.
"I have established My plans for you to thrive in life, and you will succeed whenever you put Me first.
"You are so very special to Me.
"I see you now, and smile at the eagerness you have to live your life.
"Rest in Me, Daughter, and work from rest so that it can become the joy set before you as you move with the effortlessness of My Spirit's wind...
"Fill up on Me, Beloved, when you lay at the feet of your Savior...and give Me the offering of your time and attention.
"I will shower you in the glory of My righteousness so that you will not slip on anything unholy...
"You cannot do anything to be more approved by your Father in Heaven.
"You have been justified and now carry My gift of righteousness.
"I am lifting from you every burden so that with the lightness of My yoke you can achieve.
"Draw near to Me, as I draw near to you and know that I can see you.
"You are not alone for I Am with you.
"Even as you admire...much more I admire your sweetness.
"Give to Me your faith in motion and I will become the shield around you, protecting you from the fears of life.
"You are surrounded now with wings of everlasting.
"Soar with Me, Precious, and rise up to be a beacon of light shining...
"You were not made to fully understand the depths of My love.
"Your heart is My garden, and we will plant together seed that produces life.
"I have collected your tears in My hand, knowing what purpose has been produced to cause you to become more like Me."

Isn't God just beyond amazing? I cherish His personal love to me...

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Friday, August 10, 2012

The Muse I {Guest Post}

My brother writes. I aspire to his prowess, eternally.

Case in point, I give you the first 700 words of The Muse.

________________

Some stories begin and end badly. We generally call these tragedies and, like murderously spicy ghost peppers they should consumed in small doses or not at all. Similarly, a good tragedy is equal parts ironic and contemplative, accentuating a concept greater than sorrow in light of some greater truth. Simple sorrows compounded and collected are freely available at every city corner where a man with a cardboard sign and a practiced frown reside.

Despite all initial appearances, this story is not a tragedy. As a rule, stories with good endings must begin badly in order to accentuate the true sweetness at its core and conclusion.

Melpomenes was the muse of tragedy. With dark hair and eyes red and rimmed from tears she was never the less ethereal in a dark, overcast sort of way. For several centuries now it had been her divinely appointed duty to sit at the side of weeping, heartbroken playwrights, poets, and authors as they poured their liquid soul into page after page of soliloquy and regret. It was a depressing job, but Melpomenes had always been very good at it and honing purgatorial pangs into timeless tragedy was truly her life work.

In the old days it was a scant few who had the time to write and her work had been light. Skipping between the bearded, toga wearing aficionados of the genre had been simple work. The work was tedious and time consuming, but with so much time in copying and recopying, only the very best of her work ever made it into the hands of her avid patrons. Then had come the printing press and as had always been the case for her mythic kin, technology had been her undoing. Now anyone with time and money could see their tragic tale printed bound and sold and with few exceptions it was dreadful.

Her child's father had been one of these exceptions. Tubercular with dwindling fortunes, the young man, confined to his dreary room with its battered old four poster bed and moth eaten curtains had grasped the concept of suffering and the scope of remorse like few since Shakespeare. His prose was heavenly, his poetry divine, and his plays entirely inspired.

Perhaps it had been the utterly doomed and catastrophic nature of the thing, but Melpomenes had fallen head over heels in love. Breaking the ancient musaic codes which limited any contact with the creator to untraceable inspirational whispers, she had revealed herself in the guise of a charming and unsolicited maid. With all the frantic passion of the hopeless, the sad Englishman with his droopy blue eyes and sallow features was married and died in only very nearly that order.

So it was on that in the early Spring of 1805, as Napoleon trampled Europe and great men gathered across the continent to discuss his demise, that a small infinitely delicate basket was left on the steps of the House on Dunnagh's Moor. It had stormed all day that day, the rain so hard, and the sky so murky that even the ducks in narrow moat took shelter from the thundering sky. As the housekeeper Mrs. Mulrooney told it years later, it was if the very heavens themselves were weeping cold iron from a broken heart.

The proprietor of the house, Colonel Dunnagh was the last in a great line of Dunnaghs reaching back to the great clans and further. With one eye, one leg, eight fingers, and a single ragged ear, he had at last been forced out of his majesties service by reason of insubordination. Returning to his decrepit ancestral home, the mossy battlements crumbling about the great wooden door, the battered soldier quickly remembered why he had left. In his youth, the young soldier, wild and charming had taken a Spanish wife, a creature of sun kissed villas and fragrant vineyards. Bringing her to his chilly Highland manor, the woman had, despite his unending ministrations, slowly withered and died. Guilt ridden, the young Lord Dunnagh had purchased a commission in the Royal Army vowing never to return.

Well liked, the young lieutenant had risen quickly in the ranks, catching the attention of his commanders by volunteering for the most uncharitable and well nigh suicidal missions fighting first the French, then the Colonists, and every type and sort between. Finally mustered out after a sword swinging rant against the Kings cowardly practice of paying other nations to fight Napoleon, when, in his words he would put him down for a bob, the battered old man had found himself with nowhere to go but to the home he hated. His superiors had been relieved.

______

To be continued...

Thursday, August 9, 2012

More Than A Year!

Wait! Just a second...

Think & Thinkibility has been blogging more than a year!

Happy birthday to all the readers and followers!

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My wishlist this birthday

To share what I have been learning
To hear others' thoughts in response
To grow in grace, concision, faith, wisdom, discretion, and insight in written word

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All time hits 9,525
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Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Living for Reality

Reality. Its just what people need to see. Does that girl standing by herself even know what its like to feel perfect, unchanging love? Does she know she doesn’t have to be faultless to meet some unreal standard, even from people she adores? Does she know loving God and living life is actually an amazingly happy experience of freedom and peace, not a matching set of cruel judgment and rules?

Sometimes, my heart throbs with that anthem on behalf of others. Real life in Christ is so holy…yet unabashedly fun. How do people skip the combo? The forward to a favorite book entitled The Christian’s Secret to A Happy Life from 1883, starts with an anecdote from a “keen observer.” He says, “You Christians seem to have a religion that makes you miserable. You are like a man with a headache. He does not want to get rid of his head, but it hurts him to keep it. You cannot expect outsiders to seek very earnestly for something so uncomfortable.” So I ask you, why miss out when you have it all?

My phone rang and rattled in the cup holder as I drove down a winding road along the waterfront. I saw the name of a dear young girl across my screen and decided to pull over to take it. I steered into a turnout, usually packed with local fisherman: but the sun was so hot this particular morning, that I found myself alone.

“Hello Sweetheart! What’s up?” I answered.

Yells of anger and desperation flooded from the receiver. Surprised, I jerked the phone back from my ear and waited for the torrent to let up a little. The girl’s mother was the tortured voice pouring out the anguish of “bigger issues” onto me with blame from a heart of obvious misery. I took a deep breathe and verbally juggled my own sudden emotions with hers, searching for some sort of comprehension of what was tearing her apart and what I could have possibly done to make it apply to me. She hung up on me after only a few minutes of accusatory, divisive rage.

I sat there for another 45 minutes, at least. Yes, I had a full schedule, but now I had an overflowing heart, too. I prayed, I called my parents, and I just felt plain old sad. The dear friend called back after several hours passed and apologized profusely, taking back her vindictive accusations. Yet, I still lived on in wonder and tearful self-examination. “What’s going on? I just want to love people and be in love with You!” I begged the Lord.

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What’s the connection to the topic of happy reality, you ask? That’s just it. “Bigger issues” aside, whatever they might have been for the poor mommy, her standard of perfection pressed upon others is made by herself from what she has heard is “good.” God has a different standard than ours and sometimes…we are so blinded by self-righteousness or stuff good people say that we block out His glittering glory of mercy, grace, freedom, joy, peace, and downright truth for what it actually is. And God is lost in our image of who we have created in our own imagination. No wonder people live like they have a headache…

I would never in my entire life cross a parent’s boundaries for their own child. But at the same time, I find in myself a need to abide by a standard so much higher in a different way than apparently can be comprehended by those blinded by their own opinion. God makes demands upon me to live for Him, without any fake layer of perfection. He has asked me to yield to Him to change me day by day, but also to be real about my thoughts, my attitudes, my emotions, and trust Him with how others take it. Meanwhile, I cannot be tossed around by mere good people’s opinions and perspectives…and neither should they. What does God have to say? And how does He want your life to look lived before Him…and the entire watching world? I cannot live for you, regardless of how much I love you.

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Monday, August 6, 2012

Just Sayin'

If you are not perfect, the world will not fall apart.

Is it you who is “in control of the affairs of men”?

Even if it is not your idea and coming from a standardly dumb source, could it possibly actually be a VERY good idea?

What mistake is bigger than God?

Do you rant at people about their mistakes…to help them?

Our desires to protect and preserve what we have…may actually be glorified selfishness.

Our focus on making people better for their own good…may actually be destroying relationships.

Our passion for making life great for everyone by eliminating others’ mistakes …may actually be making life very irritating.

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Saturday, August 4, 2012

My Precious [Pig] Pain

“People will hate you for saying what you have to say, you know.” A mentor told me warningly.

“Being someone’s confidant, especially when that person is in sin is scary business. Its like medicating a pig. You’re going to get bruised and dirty and they don’t care that you are trying to help. All they know is pig. Pig is most important. Pig in pain.” My brown-haired brother told me.

“You know who people are. You just do. So make sure you let God pick who you hang in there to help.” My black-haired brother comforted me.

“I can’t have any more of my daughter being sacrificed for foolish people who won’t take real love. Let ‘em go.” My dad implored from his bench in the woodshed where he worked, as I listened from the seat of the lawnmower.

“You better be checking that you’re right and you better have a clean record.” My mom always warns me, her eyebrows knit together.

“Just quit taking people’s [bad behavior].” My baby sister rants, snatching the fluffiest pillow.

“I hope Satan never loses your address because you have chosen to become unworthy of his attack.” A pastor friend preached.

So I balance these thoughts from treasured people…And I look into a world of pain. Usually, the needy people sure don’t look like “pigs” to me despite my brother’s truly insightful remark, and I want to hug them and give them the truth that makes me so free! But there are things I have learned over the years of being a mentor and loving plain old people.

Women counsel women and men counsel men or it is soon properly titled something else.
If someone’s life is one big drama after drama of trouble or rumors, don’t touch it with a fifty foot back scratcher unless God commands you to crucify your reputation and be Christ to the drama cannibals. And sometimes He does.
When people bash you, which is inevitable, self-examine and hear them out. But always realize that your love is on Satan’s radar and He really wants to rip you up.

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Don’t seek people out to “help.” Let them come, and if you love them truly…they will.
No matter what…Be real and honest.

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Don’t attempt to fix, meddle, or… give advice to someone who is not ready.
Wait for God to work. This often means keeping your mouth shut about their obvious issues and your knees on the floor in prayer, while keeping your window of opportunity in their life open for the right moment.

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Don’t expect to be heard, but expect to hear.
You had better be so connected to the Lord in your thoughts and life, that you don’t get

Sucked dry
Put down
Trapped
Saying the wrong thing
Lost
Stressed
Feeling hopeless
Burned

Oh, you will have some of those things happen, but at least you will have no guilt that it was your fault, and you will know something bigger than you is happening for God’s glory.
Others will judge who don’t honestly care about the individual you mentor. Deal with it, inside.
Be trustworthy, and breaking confidence better be epically rare.
Never talk down to anyone.
Nobody can argue with experience, even if truth is rejected.
Enter every conversation realizing that it is probably you who is going to learn something today.

I will always keep loving and always keep learning. So thank you Lord for this beautiful sacrifice called love that You did first. Help me to do it right.

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