Her eyes narrowed at me sharply, “When did you stop putting a curve in the tail of your number ‘2’?” I wasn’t sure what to say. I turned my math paper over and closely examined all my “2’s.” Sure enough, their tails were straight, crisp, even legible. I looked at her sheepishly, somewhat lost. “Why?” I whispered, glancing around the hushed testing room, a little perplexed.
“I’ve been putting a curve on my “2” ever since I saw yours in 2nd grade. How could you do this to me?” She was definitely as far put out by my offensive behavior as her lower lip. Even in my 5th grade mind, I must have missed something; my underdeveloped sense of kindness ruined her life.
I might have a fear. And its growing. People keep showing me I have a problem.
I can go a morning, oblivious to the tender soul I just trampled through ignorance. Therefore, I need a balance: someone to tell me, “Hey. That was mean, man.” My frank reality usually forgets to add sugarto my words. I apparently season only with salt and pepper.
Also brought to my attention recently is this keen capability to tell a crying child, mid fit, “Brush it off. Get up. Let’s go.” as I pick them up by the collar and keep walking. Small quantities of blood are supposed to be there. Something has to scab over. (When found unconscious or bleeding profusely, I have been known to tear my own clothing to offer aid, in case you were wondering the extent of said callousness.)
This meanstreak is capped off by being the person who stands at the back of the room, or passes tissues (or towels, if necessary), without rushing to the center of the circle around a sobbing soul. I suppose they would rather not make a scene and I stand back and don’t help people who don’t need help. Is this really “heartless”?
The word “necessary” just leaped off the page at me. I caught its significance. “Do or say only what is necessary” is my subconscious mantra. Sadly, it is taking years to tone it down; mold it into something that even looks as kind as my heart truly feels.
I am told my outlook is less than feminine. I am such a man about being kind that...Ha. Wait a second.
What is femininity? It is never defined by someone else’s opinion. It is just being a woman, whoever you are and loving. It is just that easy. Love for real, giving without motive of reward and you will be adequately “feminine.” Actually, a lot falls into place if you’re giving true, selfless love. Isn’t that wonderful?
No comments:
Post a Comment