Being Right...Like Everyone Else

I snuggled into the sofa with an arm around my little sis and a pencil in my right hand. She’d been begging to do a personality study together, dragging around this shredded booklet from my high school years, practically traipsing behind me for days with a pencil and a calculator in hand. When I finally stopped going and doing, called her over, and settled down, the results were very enlightening…




“OK, so, Johanna, between these four words, you rate which is highest in your traits with ‘four’ as the highest. ‘Argumentative,’ ‘Fun-loving,’ ‘Logical,’ ‘Patient.’ Ha! That’s so easy! Definitely in that order! ”

“Why? All of our arguments are based on logic first and if we’re not having fun we always stop. You aren’t making sense. So its definitely ‘Logical,’ ‘Fun-Loving,’ ‘Argumentative,’ and then ‘Patient.’ You know it. Agree with me.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes—Well…Apparently, you better put ‘Argumentative’ first.” I teased her.



In the end, we graphed our stats on the chart and laughed at ourselves, and the people we are most likely to not “get-along-with.” My poor sister is an extreme version of my strong traits. I wonder why?



This is me. Apparently, as a personality I deeply value

• Achieving goals and results

• Activity and challenge

• Approval

• Free-spirit

• Emotion

• Control over my given dominions

• Loyalty and Listening

• Variety

• Relating to people through verbal persuasion

• Social contact

• The bottom line

• Spontaneity

• Verbal encouragement and recognition

• Goals



Enough about me and my intensity, there are two complete personalities with which I have next to no similarities. When we read the description of these people, I saw listed before my eyes all the people with whom I have to purpose to maintain healthy relationships.



“Hey Dad! Did you know that you and I are completely opposite in every way possible in how we want to be treated and how we respond?” I called out across the house.

“Yes, I guess I know.” He quietly agreed, as he turned another page in his historical text on North Korea.



These are my non-traits that make me squirm sometimes—and perfectly describe my dad.

• Allow time to process everything

• Non-structured

• Lengthy, recurring explanation

• Routines

• Wants things to stay the way they are

• Cooperative

• Non-verbal

• Desires assurance

• Enjoys solitude





When we look at others, do we see where they are weak in our strengths—or where they are strong in our weaknesses? If I find myself seeing some personalities as “lacking character,” is it that—or the fact that they are just different from how I operate, utilizing their own gifts? What I may see as “indecision” regarding making dinner, is really thoughtfully taking time to do a careful analysis of every detail so everyone’s at peace, mingled with a desire for loving assurance and a personal preference to avoid drastic change as much as possible. I’m likely to just do it and get it done now, considering a different set of life factors, and if someone doesn’t like the decision, they most likely need to grow in that area for their own long-term benefit. The opposites are both “right;” both are kind in their own way.



We already know this about personalities, right? …But it is easy to forget. Maybe I’m the only one who sinks into that place of seeing others in light of ourselves, but what about you?

Source: flickr.com via Johanna on Pinterest